The canonised adventures of Carlo Acutis

By Jayden Wong

Carlo Acutis had just walked through the gates of heaven when the angel beside him received a phone call. Yes, believe it or not, angels use phones and somehow have 4 bars of reception, even in heaven.

Anyways, once the angel hung up, he told Carlo, “Hey, buddy. So, back down there, the old Pope just declared you’re a saint. God wants you at his palace.”

Carlo was confused and a little bit flustered. “Wait, what? So I’m a saint? Doesn’t that process take years to do? I’ve only been dead for a few days!

“One day in Heaven equals one year on Earth,” was all the angel said.

The angel took him to a train station, where he told the driver, “This guy needs to be delivered to God’s palace. No breaks, take him there as quickly as you can.” The driver agreed, for they both knew how God’s punishments were.

As soon as they arrived, Carlo was still trying to wrap his mind around everything. However, his train of thought was broken by the magnificent sight of God’s palace.

Tall, imposing pillars surrounded the large perimeter of the palace, and everything was snow white. Little patterns adorned the walls, and it was like a painting come true.

“Go in,” said the angel driver.

“How? There’s no door!” Carlo replied.

“Just use your wings,” the angel said, and that was when Carlo realized that he had wings on his back, just like a hummingbird's. He tried to control them like his hands, and it worked!

Behind the walls, there was a big castle surrounded by little spikes and apartments, which Carlo thought might house different saints like him. He wondered when he would get his own apartment.

He suspected that God’s throne room was probably the tallest spire of the castle, so he flew through the window. There, God sat on his throne, eating some grapes.

“Ah, young man! Getting used to Heaven yet?” God said, like they were old friends. Carlo was stunned by everything, and it took him a moment to realize that he was talking to him.

“Oh, yes, Lord. Wow, you look so tall in real life!” said Carlo, trying to strike up some small talk.

“Yes, I don’t know why all those statues down on Earth downsize me so much. Anyways, I just wanted to summon you to say congratulations. Being a Saint isn’t a picnic, you know. Well, it’s probably been a long day for you. Saint Patrick will show you to your apartment, and here’s your room card. See you at dinner! The angels will guide you there.”

A man with a white beard and a green robe came into the throne room and showed Carlo around the estate. They chatted for a while, and soon they got to know each other well. “See you at dinner, Carlo. Sit next to me. I’ll be next to Saint Francis.”

As Carlo closed the door, he lay down on his bed, wondering what in the world he had gotten himself into.